


He was his

by shippingisprobsmyjob007



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Confession, Fluff, M/M, changlix, implied minsung, mentioned changlix, minsung - Freeform, my poor heart misses stray kids so much and i'm hella sad so their happiness is my happiness rn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-23
Updated: 2019-05-23
Packaged: 2020-03-10 00:47:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18927892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shippingisprobsmyjob007/pseuds/shippingisprobsmyjob007
Summary: Every so often, Bang Chan would mentally crash. Only one person was patient enough to deal with the situation. And though this time was different, Kim Woojin knew exactly how to go about it anyway.





	He was his

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Thank you for reading my story! If you enjoy this story and want to keep up to date with all of my story ideas and new chapters for multi chapter stories, follow me on my twitter @sipmj_007 !!

It wasn’t a surprise to anyone who knew him that, every so often, Chan would crash. It wasn’t pretty, either, and only one person usually kept his cool long enough to actually help out. It was why Woojin was not surprised when, in the middle of buying some groceries accompanied by one of the managers, he received a call from an obviously distressed Jeongin.

“Woojin-hyung, how much longer are you gonna take?”

“Not long, why?” he was choosing a pack of chicken, they could argue later about how other foods existed.

“Chan-hyung is.... Having a moment?” Jeongin replied. He sounded concerned, no, scared. Absolutely terrified. But none of it was phasing Woojin at all. It was normal. It hadn’t happened in so long but it still was normal. Jeongin always got scared. Most of them did, anyway. Even he did, because though he was used to stern talks from Chan whenever he wanted a project to go perfectly, it didn’t compare to this sort of situation. It was scary because Chan would remain silent, stuck in his room surrounded by empty packs of instant ramen and uneaten actual meals, cans of energy drinks some finished, others half way, cups of coffee he’d somehow convince the managers to bring him… the bed would be perfectly clean and untouched because, as Woojin learned the first time it happened, Chan wouldn’t sleep for _days._ He wouldn’t shower. He wouldn't’ speak to anyone. He’d go into his room and spend his time trying to figure out what would be a perfect song to compose and produce, what would be a good concept to go with it and, with all those questions, came to worries of how everyone would take it, the group, the team, the fans… and he’d spiral with no control until his thoughts were just slightly darker than the bags under his eyes.

“I’ll be home soon,” Woojin replied simply, hanging up and sighing. He knew picking up chicken was a good idea all the time, but now he was convinced he somehow knew today would be like this.

Arriving to the dorms was uneventful. Seungmin and Hyunjin tried their best to keep Jeongin occupied while they heard the loud groans and frustrated cries coming from the hallway. The three smiled weakly at Woojin, feeling a bit sorry nobody could do anything to appease Chan, meaning he’d have to take it all in and work on it on his own. But it never bothered him, on the contrary, he prided himself a bit in being Chan’s calming force _though he wished he didn’t need one at all._ Woojin went to the kitchen first, where Jisung and Minho whispered their concerns to each other. Upon seeing Woojin walk in, Minho signaled for him to come closer.

“It’s not like other times.”

“Can’t be much different, they never are,” Woojin replied calmly. Jisung and Minho stared at each other and then Jisung sighed.

“You don’t understand. He came over to the kitchen to grab water or something while Felix and Changbin were making themselves some snacks. Felix asked him how he was doing and he just snapped at him. It was uncalled for. He never snaps at anyone…” Jisung explained and this finally managed to make Woojin start to think that maybe his approach would have to be different.

“He… snapped at them?” Woojin asked and both Jisung and Minho nodded.

“Everyone heard. That’s why Jeongin called you,” Minho said, taking a sip of his water.

Woojin considered his options. He could go into Chan’s room and go about his usual routine for this situation, or, he could wait until Chan had calmed himself. _But he never calms himself,_ Woojin thought and sighed loudly.

“Well, wish me luck everyone!” and with that, Woojin walked away towards Chan’s room.

He didn’t knock, he never did, though he didn’t expect a pillow fly straight into his face with a mumbled “go away!”

“Oh, good. We are acting like bratty teenagers, I see,” Woojin said which made Chan actually look and stand up. His eyes were swollen and so were his lips, which made Woojin wonder how many times he bit on them due to frustration.

“I screamed at Felix,” Chan cried and put his face against the pillow again. He wasn’t moving, so Woojin closed the door and walked over to the side of the bed. He sat down and began to softly caress Chan’s back. As usual, Chan tensed up at first but relaxed right after.

“For no reason, from what I heard?” Woojin asked. Chan mumbled a yes and Woojin smiled softly. It _was_ like other times. It’s just this time, he didn’t make it in time to keep Chan from snapping at anyone. And he knew that doing so to Felix hurt Chan more than it could’ve hurt anyone else. Which is why he wasn’t surprised Chan was now sobbing.

That was his sign. Woojin moved into a more comfortable position to sit on the bed with his back against the wall. He held Chan while softly playing with his hair and started to sing. He kept his singing low and steady, while Chan cried frantically onto his lap. He was shaking strongly enough that the bed did so too, and he would have sporadic spasms that would sometimes scare Woojin. Woojin began to scan the room. As he expected, lots of cans of energy drinks laid around, he tried to guess how many Chan actually finished and how many were left half full. Various packs of instant ramen were sprawled both on the floor and on the corner of Chan’s desk. He was surprised to find a single bottle of water standing at the desk, that was new, though it probably made no difference considering the amount of sugar and caffeine that was probably rushing through his body right now.

He saw countless papers also sprawled on the floor and on the desk, many of them crumpled, other completely broken into pieces, and, the ones that seemed intact, had so many scribbles and notes that Woojin might not be able to ever decipher. Chan’s laptop was open and unlocked and Woojin could see the program Chan used to work on the songs.

It felt like days to Woojin but, at some point, Chan fell asleep. Woojin tried to dry some of the tears that remained on his face though not much could be done for the faint lines left by the ones that did dry on his skin. He carefully shuffled so he could let Chan’s head rest on a pillow and he could go. He turned off the lights and grabbed one of the energy drinks that was still at the desk. _Half full,_ he thought, a faint but sad smile on his face.

When he walked to the living room it was dark already, but everyone had been sitting together, watching a movie.

“He’s asleep,” Woojin informed and Changbin immediately paused the movie. “Felix, are you here?”

“Yes,” Felix replied and it took Woojin a few seconds to locate him bundled up in a blanket as dark as their floor with his head resting on Changbin’s lap.

“Okay good. I just wanted to make sure you’re okay?” Woojin asked.

“Yes,” Felix replied once again.

“Well, he was disturbingly sad about it so I’ll make him apologize to you tomorrow,” Woojin said as he took a seat next to Minho.

“He doesn’t have to,” Felix said but Woojin shook his head.

“He has to and he will. To you and everyone else.”

“Did he manage to explain what happened?” Minho asked and Woojin shook his head.

“My best guess is song writing. But I can’t understand… it has been a couple of comebacks since he had an episode and I seriously doubt that’s all it is,” Woojin explained.

“Do you think it’s… us?” Changbin asked worriedly while pointing at Felix and himself.  Woojin smiled and shook his head.

“If anything, he thinks you guys waited too long. No, that’s not it either. We’ll find out tomorrow though. You guys should get some sleep, okay? Did you have dinner already?” at everyone nodding Woojin gave a relieved smile. He stood up and stretched. “In that case, I’m going to bed. Good night guys!”

As he was laying on the bed, Woojin pondered on the reasons why Chan’s breakdown was so sudden and so _violent._ He was unsure how to go about it the next day. But all he could do was sleep. He managed to get Chan to actually sleep at a decent time for the first time in forever and he wanted to take that victory as a reason to go to bed, too.

 

\-------

 

Chan knew. He definitely knew Woojin would question the hell out of him. Which is why when he woke up the next morning before anybody else, instead of going back to sleep, he changed his clothes and practically ran out of the dorms. It was too early, but maybe he could hide in the studio for a while. But, it’d be easy for Woojin to find him there so he decided not to and just let himself wander for a little while before remembering his favorite tree at the park closest to the dorms.

He’d never admit to anyone how much he loved this tree. Because, in doing so, he’d have to explain why and he was absolutely not ready to admit that, sitting by that specific tree, he saw his friend walking towards him and he felt his heart melt for the first time. He remembered specifically how the last rays of sunlight hit him in all the right corners and when he smiled at him and offered him a hand to stand up he looked like an actual angel. Not that Chan would know what an actual angel looked like. He just figured if he had to choose what they did look like, they would look like Woojin smiling at him with the last rays of sunshine highlighting his face at the end of a long day.

There was nothing scarier for him then than anyone finding out. In his mind, taking care of his group was his first priority. They were a good team, and him and Woojin were so good at looking out for everyone that if anything went wrong, he wouldn’t forgive himself.

It had been eating at him inside for weeks. When Felix and Changbin finally confessed to each other Chan was ecstatic, and so _so_ jealous. He desperately wanted that, he’d look at Woojin and long for him even if he was just across the room.  

“I must be going crazy,” Chan whispered when he saw Woojin. He figured he was just thinking so much of him that he was seeing him right there, just like that day. But, instead of offering his hand to help him up, Woojin sat down in front of him and Chan cursed when he realized he wasn’t imagining Woojin there. “How did you find me?”

“You like this tree. You sit by it every time we come to the park. I figured the studio would be too obvious of a choice to hide from me today?” Woojin smiled, the same smile he gave him that day and every day since they met. Chan blushed and looked down, nodding. “So, about Felix, I expect you will be apologizing to him later?”

“Yes,” Chan said, starting to fidget with some pieces of grass.

“And the rest of the guys, correct?” Woojin asked and Chan nodded. He couldn’t bear to look at Woojin in the eyes, but he knew and could feel his stare at him. “And me?”

“You?” Chan asked. This made him look at Woojin and he knew he wasn’t prepared for it, but he did so anyway. He tensed up as his heart felt like it was doing back flips.

“Yes, me.”

“I’m sorry,” Chan started but Woojin chuckled.

“A good start, yes. But I think we both know that’s not what I meant.”

“No?”

“No.”

“So, what is it?” Chan asked. Woojin shrugged.

“You know who cleans up after you every time these happen? Me. It’s not only making sure the guys are okay and aware that this isn’t their fault and that you’ll be okay as long as you have us. I literally clean after you. Which is why every time you come back from that dark place, your room is immaculate. Are you following what I’m saying?” Chan just stared at Woojin, unsure on how to respond. He was following, he knew where this was going, if his memory served him correctly… “Now, usually, I’d be worried if somebody wrote my name in scribbles that look angry and frustrated because it somehow feels I’m being threatened. But they were yours, your scribbles, of my name on top of unfinished lyrics. _Love_ lyrics.”

“See, as you were talking I truly hoped I could come up with a way to jokingly convince you I _was_ threatening you,” Chan replied. Woojin smiled.

“Is this why you went to that dark place? It hadn’t happened in so long…”

“You don’t understand,” Chan interrupted but Woojin glared at him making him immediately shut up.

“Help me understand then.”

“I love you, Woojin.”

“I love you too, Chan,” Woojin replied and Chan shook his head.

“No, I mean, I _love_ you Woojin,” Chan tried to explain.

“And I _love_ you, Chan.”

“I’m not sure we’re on the same page. I love you… like Felix and Changbin love each other.”

“Please tell me I am Changbin in this scenario.”

“What?” Chan asked confused as he was expecting anything else but that. “Why?”

“Listen, I don’t know how to explain it more than with the fact that this morning when I woke up Felix was trying to throw a piece of waffle into Changbin’s mouth like he was playing basketball.”

Chan started to laugh. He could imagine it. And it was hilarious. “Did he score?”

“No, Chan, he didn’t,” Woojin tried to remain serious but it was pointless. He just laughed along with Chan who was tearing up a bit. When both were able to breathe and calm themselves. Woojin stood up and offered his hand to Chan so he could stand up too. “I won’t mind if you try that on me as long as it’s chicken and you _do_ score.”

“What does this mean?”

“You are my boyfriend, Chan. Can’t back out now. I saw the lyrics. Do you really think I look like an angel?” Woojin teased. Chan scoffed.

“Only when the sunlight is shining on you the right way.” Woojin softly smacked Chan on the shoulder but began to walk away while still holding his hand.

“Who do you think will confess first? Jisung or Minho?”

“Jisung’s entire day consists of confessing to Minho, Woojin, at this point it’s more on what Jisung will do rather than say…” Chan joked.

“Yes, you’re right. I love you, Chan.”

“I love you too, Woojin.”

“You still have to apologize to Felix and the guys,” Woojin said sternly.

“I already told you I will!” Chan complained. Hand in hand they made their way back to the dorms, telling each other how much they loved each other and how long they actually waited for this day. The weight of his secret was lifted from Chan’s shoulders every step of their way back to the dorms and he began to feel that this was what he was missing. Woojin had always been there, yes. But now he was his.


End file.
